Atrophied.

السلام عليكم

  

Our muscle is made for movements. If we don't move for a period if time, the muscle will be wasted and  atrophied.

 

It was our third week of class and we are now divided into respective clinical postings. There are 4 postings, namely Surgery, Internal Medicine, Obstetrics & Gynaecology and  Paediatrics. I got Paeds for my first posting. I didn't saw it coming. I was aiming for IM first as I would like to start difficult as IM is know to be one of the hardest posting. 

I have no idea how to inspect children. And they different anatomy and physiology, and the fact that they can't really express their thoughts were just so intimidating for me.

Paeds' first week of posting was more on more lectures and tutorials compare to other posting which had started their ward rounds and seeing patients. 

Honestly, my first day of posting was a bit 'hambar' to compare to my friends. They would excitedly tell us our day when we would just smile and say, "Kitorang ada intro class je hari ni". And this persist for the whole week.

By the second day, I was so lost. I guess my energy level was meant for the wards and I was sitting at the back listening to lectures. I mean I should be grateful that I don't need to stand for 2 hours, right?

So I decided to join my friends at the O&G floor just to visit some patients to ignite the passion that is slowly thinning away.

First word: Waaaaahhh.

I felt like a kid in a candy shop.

There were so many women with distended tummy, all of them are future mommyyy. 

The neighbouring ward was filled with mommies with their newborns. They were soooo adorable, pure and innocence :')

I got to clerk one patient who will be having her Lower Segmental Caesarian Section (LSCS) the next day. Usually they will undergo LSCS to prevent any complications during labour eg the baby is too big, or the mom is too small to push the baby.

Upon history taking, the mother (who is now is her second pregnancy) was very healthy. She had personally requested for the LSCS, even her first child. She might be afraid of the normal labour. Or she might think it is easier for the 'pantang' process as she is all alone with no mother to take care of her and that her husband is a policeman and will be very busy to take care of her.

Nevertheless, I got to palpate her distended abdomen and I can feel the baby's limbs! It was as if the baby was giving a hi 5! from the fetal world. There, there little ones. The world might be a cruel place to be, but hopefully your presence would make this world a better place to be :)

(Written on 8th September 2015)

Thank you dear friends,

 who was there for me when I went 'meroyan' because I was so atrophied.

During my post-proexam holiday,

I actually went to Japan with a group of friends!

I'll save that story for later!

Wassalam :)

 

Unscatched.

  السلام عليكم

It’s been a while. Now, for a little update.

I’ve now completed my 2^nd year of study; 3 more years to go.

Referring to my previous post, I was still in my 4^th block of Year 2, the toughest block of all! Knowing my own minuscule effort, I didn’t think I can pass that block. It was too hard for me. I want to blame it to the curricular but I know I was the one who lack of focus in class. Sometimes when the lecture gets too blurry (and difficult you just wanna sit in the corner and weep), you just gave up on listening. 

I should work harder, I admit. If I didn’t understand something, I should ask my friends who are more knowledgeable, better the lecturers themselves. There are also tons of helpful YouTube videos available that I could watch. 

A key to success in med school is by REPEATING. Well, that’s what I’m lacking off. Me trying to complete a topic ONCE is a success by its own definition. 

Due to lack of preparation, I was not ready to sit for exams. I was so nervous. I tried my best though. I fought hard. It feels I like a fought a lion with my bare hand. It wasn’t easy. The success rate was depressing.

For my first paper, I was the earliest to leave the exam hall. I cannot face the paper anymore. I just can’t do it no more. Outside, my shaking hands were ice cold and I was tachycardic.

In the ends, I called my mom and ask, “Ma, kalau Hanie fail block ni boleh tak?”. First time ever, I asked my Mom if I can fail an exam. When I judge my own performance, I know was failing it.

In Allah’s will, Alhamdulillah I pass block 4! It was very surprising! 

I must say, 

du’a during Ramadan is very mustajab. 

Thank you all for the du'a.

Thank you Allah for this blessing :’) 

Sulcus and gyrus.

السلام عليكم

I was trying to write down at least a post every month. Apparently, I missed my April post. I did have something in mind to be blurted out, and due to time constraints (and unclear reason why I was so lazy to type) I decided to just go on with life.

We human just plan. That's what we do. Sometimes we didn't plan anything, but things happen anyway. Allah is the BEST planner. 

I just had my LAST and FINAL minitest yesterday. Phewww, what a relief is was over! Imagine we need to learn the nasty neuroanatomy, which basically means  we're learning about brain parts, it's blood supply, gyrus and sulcus. We suffered I tell you.

On second thought, it was fascinating to learn about our brain. HOw it is weigh about 2% of our total body weight, but consume 20% of our body energy. That's a lot! This shows out brain works the most from other organs.

And it is so unique. I just can't simply put it into words how amazing it is. I wish I was a brain who is efficient in multitasking, because we can't have enough of things to do huh?

Anyway, I have just re-watched The Princess Diaries after more than 10 years! It was out in 2001 and it is now 2015! *tua alert* I've forgot the last time I watched the movie. It was one of my favorite!

Re-watching it brings back the memory. It feels like someone return your lost luggage at the airport. All your fogs of worry fades away and a rush of endorphins runs in.

I remember being a nerdy, ugly duckling who feels like an outcast sometimes. As the fable continues, it happens out you were surround by the wrong ducks.

With the right circle of friends, you are free to be a nerd giving 'hambar' jokes and to suffer an ugly crying face. And you know your beautiful swans will always be there for you.

So girls, I'm sorry if I ever hurt you in any of my mean way. Hah, you don't read my blog anyway :P

Now I know why

people looks up at neurologists/neurosurgeon. 

Ramadhan is very near! *excited*

Allahuma balighna Ramadhan

Wassalam :)

Feeling twenty-two ;)

السلام عليكم

Happy birthday to Hanie! 

Let this be a yearly routine of writing down something on my birthday. 

I just LOVE birthdays, especially mine :P I have this hobby of giving hints and reminding people that my birthday is coming. 

Well, I don't expect a large scale birthday party. But I do hope I can share my excitement and contentment with the people around me. 

I LOVE birthdays since my first birthday cake. When I was too small and my parents need to hold me in their arms and assist me on slicing the cake.

I don't know about you,

But I'm feeling twenty-two. 

Gotta love Taylor for coming up with this song.

Slit.

السلام عليكم

 

 

Gonna have a little ramble here.

 

Today is Saturday and while others are enjoying their weekend night out, us, the medical students are facing our textbooks and lecture notes. Also, our morning weekends will be spent in the library. Those are some of the things we sacrifice for the benefits of others.

 

That was preface.

 

I just ended my second week of third block. Another block to go and then it's our first professional exam. Each block will consist of 8 weeks of lecture and we'll be learning about different body systems each block. By the way, we have two professional exams that we need to sit. Once in second year, to assess whether we are competent enough to enter clinical years, and later in our fifth and final year, to confirm whether we can graduate with a MBBS scroll in our hands. 

 

Second year's syllabus is much more fun compare to first year's. During second year is where we learn all the pathologic conditions, and where we can relate our knowledge from first year. I bet clinical years will be even more exciting as we are going to apply and witness everything right before our eyes.

 

Last block, we've learn about the Gatrointestinal System. One of the best block, personally speaking. We've got a bunch of surgeons came to teach us. They exposed us to the clinical settings and they were so freaking cool. I mean, I enjoyed their class very much.

 

They inspired me to become a surgeon. I imagine myself holding a scalpel, doing an incision to perform appendectomy. Or even doing a laparoscopic cholecystectomy to remove inflamed gallbladder.

 

One day, I was sick (couldn't remember why). I couldn't helped it and decided to see the doc for some meds. Somehow I've blurted out I want to be a surgeon. He quickly shook his heads off and said, "Susah tu".

 

Excuse me doc, but nothing comes easy in life. Who are to judge my dream? You always have to work hard for it. I thought you know that better yourself. Things I should have said to him.

 

Whatever happens, we always need to work hard and SMART! May Allah grant our prayers, amin :)

 

 

Berangan tu percuma,

 realiti perlukan usaha.

 

Fresh start; 2015.

السلام عليكم

 

Happy New Year!

 

 

I ponder, why do we actually need a new year? Regardless we are referring to the Masihi or Hijri calendar.

  

I guess people need that, how should I describe it, a starting-end point? A period of time? A fresh start?

 

And why do we need to have a resolution, every year? Most of us abandon their resolution by the 7th January anyway.

 

That's where HOPE comes in the sentence. People who have resolution, HOPE that something will turn out good, HOPE that things will be better, HOPE to be the best.

 

By having a resolution, we have an aim, a goal (gold?).

 

Anyway, that was just a random thought.

 

Done this Facebook year review and scanning through pictures that they randomly picked for me. I realized I did had a wonderful 2014. Lots of things happened in a year, that I've lost my time orientation.

 

I diagnosed myself of having a minor amnesia. This is a healthy sign because I tend to forget that the scar was a painful scratch and I became oblivious to the agonizing ache.

 

Why bother about the past, when future is as exciting for a bird to take its first flight. Why fret about the things you lack, when you are drowned in the blessing of our Creator. There is always something to be thankful of.

 

By the end of 2014, the East Coast was slap by unstoppable rain. Puddles became enraged and intensify their depth. Damp melancholy prevails. Also, a dear friend's father was about to have a CABG (Coronary Artery Bypass Grafting) and having to see her eyes are all wet while she thought of a father who was never ill.

 

I do somehow feel relieved having this all write down. The moment when all your neurons start sending it's neurotransmitter towards each other, as saying hello to an old friend whom they miss.

 

 

This is all acute inflammation.

A body response to harmful stimuli,

 short duration

 and ends with healing.